“Mom,” the dude asks, “Can I get the pancakes and the
chicken strips?”
“How about we order one dinner at a time,” I say.
“I’ll get the chicken,” he says, after some serious
thought. “With French fries.”
“Broccoli,” I counter.
“Aww,” he grumbles. I
catch his frown in the rear view mirror.
“Okay, okay,” Fries are fine,” I declare, reminding myself
that this is our “fun night out.”
There were many animated discussions going on at once about what
they would order, the excitement mounting as the car neared our destination.
I am not a huge fan of chain restaurants, especially places
that offer pancakes with sprinkles on top on their children’s menu. As most of you are probably aware, this goes
completely against my Fierce Diva nutritional sensibility.
But my kids were in need of a treat.
And they love Perkins.
On top of the obvious, meaning the sugar/grease/starch issue
with pancake house food, I hesitate to spend money on “bad food,” let alone any
restaurant food at all. When things got “tough”
financially a while back, I slashed restaurant meals from our budget, as they
are “non-essentials.”
Yet, something special and fun was quite essential to them
right now, at this moment, when their home life was changing. And Perkins seemed to be the right choice, as
the ride to the restaurant was celebratory, full of giddy anticipation about
the crayons and paper placemats, the dinner rolls, and those giant cookies the
kids get for dessert.
Once there, it took me a while to settle in. I made one last ditch attempt at “no French fries,”
but it was too late.
I tried to be OK with the kid cups full of undiluted juice,
but within five minutes, I was chasing our server around the restaurant asking
for extra cups and water.
I handed out the dinner rolls a half a piece at a time –
because that flour had more bleach in it than Miley Cyrus’s new hair.
I tried to slip out without the large cookies that come with
the kids meals, but the hostess ran up to us at the door as we were leaving,
with the goods. How could I say, “No,”
with my kids in the line of the discussion?
But I had a great time, despite my serious food
aversions.
And I would – and
will – take them out for another Perkin’s night again soon.
At Perkins, time stopped for a little while. There were no
chores beckoning for me, no phones ringing, no laundry, cleaning, checking
homework, packing lunches, or articles to edit.
It was just me, sitting across the table from my children.
While my kids will talk for days about what they ate, what I
will remember is the hour in the booth with them, playing tic tac toe with
crayons on the placements, chatting about their day, and watching them eat
massive amounts of over greased, over sugared foods in pure joy.
As budget conscious as I am right now and as much as I
staunchly believe in feeding children the healthiest foods available, a once a
week Perkins trip won’t harm us (OK my heart palpitates as I write that,
because my aversion to processed foods is really more of a neurosis). My kids
need Perkins. Dare I say, I need
Perkins. Because every family needs a
little time away from the “everyday.”
Heck, maybe even I’ll order the French fries for me next
time we go!
Or not…
Namaste, Divas!
Where do you go to
spend a special night out with your family?
Have you “bent the
rules” lately to make for a happier family?
How did it work out for you?
Have your kids ever read the Ramona books by Beverly Cleary? She and her family go to a place called Whopperburger for similar reasons … and sometimes, when all hell breaks loose here, places like that are an oasis of calm. We hardly ever go out, and when we do it’s generally not for fast food, but every once in a blue moon there is Sonic to be had. Complete with roller skating car hops and vanilla shakes.
Sometimes, you just need sprinkles. 🙂
I can totally relate to this. I feel like we are bending the rules quite a bit especially around food, eating a lot more food that doesn’t fit my ideal profile because we’ve been busy and frankly, I can’t handle the arguments and fuss. I think that there’s a difference though between bending the rules and it being a treat and bending the rules and it becoming the norm which is what I’m afraid we’re heading towards in our case. It’s tough finding that balance but I do believe that it’s important to have those fun and special nights away from the every day. I’m glad that you have Perkins.
We have to bend the rules all the time with two kids on the spectrum. Most recently, though, I’ve been on a strict and VERY healthy diet. But for my eleventh anniversary, I gorged on grease. It felt SO damned good. I’m back to well behaved today, so I also now know that I can do it again if I need to.
“My aversion to processed foods is really more of a neurosis.”
OMG, yes. I can so relate. I cringe at the amount of bread my almost-3YO consumes, while trying to tell myself that 1.) she is perfectly healthy and at an ideal weight, 2.) she clearly inherited her father’s long, lean build and lightning fast metabolism, and 3.) she’s a TODDLER. At the same time, I remind myself that all that bread is by and large whole grain and also that she loves hummus, peas, green beans, fruit, and to a lesser extent, broccoli. I’m doing OK on the nutritional front, I tell myself. I read labels, cook healthfully, and serve myself and my family a balanced diet. Nutritionally speaking, I’m about as educated and informed as one can be without a registered dietician’s certification, and a night out with some “fun” foods every now has never hurt any child.
But processed food still bugs me.
P.S. I’m so sorry about your recent separation. You write so eloquently – I really need to do a better job of keeping up with your blog.
I never understand why restaurants can’t offer healthier options for kids. But, yes, you have to bend the rules every now and then. It’s that quality family time that counts.
Ha! I’m loving your “neurosis” about processed foods. We all have to be a little neurotic, right? And, oh my goodness…do I LOVE Perkins pancakes 😉
Glad you had a good time. Your kids are SO darn cute.
I am totally on your page about “bad” food. But I think it’s okay to be flexible. Rigidity only fosters rebellion, that’s been my experience and that of my husband! (Plus, holy crap I love french fries. Especially sweet potato fries.) Your kids are very cute.
I was just feeling some incredible mommy guilt lately because I think my son has been eating way too much junk food, watching way too much tv, and staying up too late. The truth is, sometimes we have to bend the rules to survive. Sigh. Such is mommyhood.
I will have to stop by your blog more often!
Yep one phrase- mac and cheese pizza. I take my kids to Cici’s pizza every now and then because it’s 1. cheap 2. a buffet so no waiting and 3. my kids go crazy for their mac and cheese pizza. I know the food is pure junk, but we eat good at home and feeding my family of 5 for $15 at a resturant cannot be beat.
We are so far from bending rules, it’s almost like we have no rules 🙂
I understand the need for healthy food, I’m constantly trying to make sure the toddler is getting nutrients. But I also understand that they are only little for so long, and I want them to remember that they had a fun childhood. It’s a fine balance, and one always wins out on the other on any given day.
I think you’re doing a great job. A cheat day is totally okay. It’s how they know that their usual healthy ways are actually better. 🙂
Oh, how I love that your mama heart knowing what your kids need – time out from the everyday, time with you – overrides your nutritional diva!
That? Is lovely mothering right there!
(Also? Cookies! Yum! Sorry, I couldn’t resist! :))
Oh this is so awesome and I’m letting go of my once a month guilt for going through the McD’s drive-thru.
You are an amazing mom. xo
Your kids are so cute. It sounds like they had fun, too.
I think that as long as our kids eat healthy most of the time, a once-in-a-while splurge of something unhealthy (but oh so yummy) isn’t going to hurt them.
We have a couple of local family restaurants that we go to for an occasional night out. We don’t go out that often, so when we do, it is a treat. It’s nice to get out and just focus on each other – not cooking or cleaning up – every once in a while. Sounds like it was fun!
Your children are adorable! And yes, I get it. I have my own neurosis about food and cringe whenever my husband treats the girls to donuts or hot dogs. I’m grateful he helps me let go and overall I’m in charge of their food intake (though how two kids survive on starch, starch and more starch with a few snap peas and clementines worked in is beyond me ;-). Good for you for letting go and enjoying time with your kids – they’re a lucky bunch! Great post!
You sound like me last Friday night at TGIFridays. One kid got broccoli instead of the coveted fries and the other got mandarin oranges. But I think you’re right about bending the rules and letting go of our nutritional neuroses – I mean, nutritional concerns – to let our kids eat what they want. Once in a while.
Well at least they had fun! We don’t go out much either, possibly because I don’t feel like taking my 7 month old and having to bf her under a blanket (because I’m modest).
Oh my! I remember the Ramona books from when I was a kid! And it’s so true – sometimes, a little fast food or a chain restaurant words magic. It must be the sprinkles on those pancakes!
I can totally relate to the bending of the rules because life is hectic. Ironically, my eating has gone to pot! Well, at least pot my MY standards – LOL! I need a juice fast or something to get me back on track!
But yes – those special nights away are fun and are part of a memory for my kids – perhaps even more special for them since I am such a food fascist!
I am so glad you are eating healthy because I truly believe in caring for our bodies – however, I also believe – more so than ever, that we need to bend the rules! And enjoy ourselves while we’re doing it!
Oh my gosh! You and I are practically soul mates in the nutritional department. I am on my kids and on myself for that matter – to eat a certain way!
My kids won’t take a juice box from a neighbor without asking me first. I’ve ruined them 🙂
Thank you for your kinds words – and right back at you – I always love visiting your page.
Right? Would a fresh fruit salad (versus canned fruit packed in syrup) be committing a crime to offer? Processed foods in general skeeve me out. But I have to remind myself that the quality time trumps the sugar and grease! And that it’s creating a memory for my kids!
Thanks, Jen! They are being cute because they are so happy to be out at Perkins – LOL! And yes, the world as a whole could stand to be a little more neurotic about food!
I am so with you on the rigidity fostering rebellion – but it might be too late to change that in this house – my kids go to friends’ houses and sneak juice boxes. I know. That says it all.
I have just recently jumped on the band wagon on bending the rules – and you know? I kind of like it! The control freak in me feels a slight amount of terror – but one step at a time. 🙂
$15 for a family of 5 is unreal. I would go to Cici’s if we had one around here! And mac and cheese pizza? I may to work on letting go of my control freak-ness a little more for THAT one – my kids would LOVE it!
I need to hang out with you more – because I seriously need to remember that giving my kids a fun childhood far outweighs their need for health food 100% of the time. Happy and fun are underrated with me sometimes. And clearly the most important things!
Do you have Perkins where you are? Those cookies are HUGE! I love the term mama heart. Yes, I may have actually gotten my inner control freak to stop talking long enough to actually LISTEN to my mama heart! xxooo
Apparently, Perkins is the gateway junk food stop – because I was at a McD’s drive thru 2 days ago! The floodgates are open!
I totally agree that if it’s the exception rather than the rule, that a little junk is ok!
Kim, that was the BEST part about our night out – that the focus was on each other. At home, I’m too distracted!
I loved going out with them – and I loved watching their love over getting to eat (almost) anything they wanted. for them, it was like Christmas but better – because that’s how neurotic I am about what they eat!
BTW – My kids would live on starch and snap peas and donuts and hot dogs if I let them!
I didn’t go out at all when I had babies – there’s so much to take with you just to sit down at enjoy a meal – PLUS the BF part – which I did, too.
Once in a while is OK – right? I’m still trying to convince myself of that since I’m such an extremist when it comes to food – LOL!