When Diva Gets Dumped: An Original Play in One Act, by The Fierce Diva
SCENE ONE
(Distraught DIVA, an attractive young woman in casual attire,sits across from DUDE, at a small table in a crowded restaurant. Both have barely touched plates of food in front of them.Dude's body is slightly turned away from Diva. His arms are crossed.)
DIVA
(Sobbing into a tissue)
It's me, isn't it? What did I do?
DUDE
I told you. You didn't do anything.
DIVA
Am I too clingy? I'm too clingy, aren't I?
DUDE
You're not too clingy.
DIVA
I'm too independent. You don't feel needed.
DUDE
You're not too independent.
DIVA
It's because I'm fat.(Pushing her plate away)I knew I shouldn't have listened to that Diva on the blog who told me to stop pounding on gym equipment…
DUDE
You look fine.
DIVA
Oh God. It's the Diva Next Door. You're leaving me for the Diva Next Door!
(The stage goes dark, followed by the sound of Diva's shrill SCREAM.)
We have all been "dumped" before, if not by a significant other, then by a friend, or perhaps an employer. Being dumped hurts, and we have to go through a period of grieving after the dumping, whether it be for a person or a job. Yet, some Divas have extreme reactions that span beyond a few weeks of feeling sad or angry. These are the Divas that become destructive, and others still, who lose their dignity.
A destructive Diva may do one of the following:
- Stay in bed for weeks on end, shunning responsibilities
- Make daily trips to the convenience store to buy crap foods to drown her sorrows
- Stop eating altogether
- Engage in retail therapy and spend more than she can afford
A Diva who loses her dignity may engage in one of these behaviors:
- Re-hash the circumstances of the dumping on the phone with a fellow Diva hours at a time, over and over again
- Facebook-stalk her ex
- Facebook-stalk her ex's new Diva
- Phone stalk her ex, and beg to be taken back
- Phone stalk her ex under the guise of wanting to remain "friends," with the secret hope that the ex will take her back
Our destructive reactions are defense mechanisms. We eat or shop to try to avoid the hurt. We act in ways that compromise our dignity in a desperate attempt to force a failed relationship to work or because we are refusing to let it go. I'm not judging you, Divas, for reacting in these ways. I've been there. In the long run, you will be better off if you can look at your behavior and ask yourself why you react so severely.
Many Divas need relationships to validate their own self worth, whether it be a boyfriend, friend, or employer. Remember how good it felt in high school to hang out with the popular crowd? Did you even like those girls, or did you put up with them because of the sense of power it gave you to be accepted by the A-listers? The same goes for work. How many of you have jobs that make you miserable, but you are attached to the salary or your prestigious title? Many Divas who engage in extreme or unhealthy behavior after a breakup do so because they were dependent on the other person or institution for their identity, and ultimately their happiness. If this is the case, it is more important than ever to remember that happiness is not dependent upon our external circumstances. Furthermore, once you stop attaching your identify to your job or your association to other people, you have much more freedom to create and live the life you love.
Next time you are dumped, pay attention to your thoughts. A yoga instructor reminded me recently that our minds are constantly trying to get us to dwell on the past or project into the future. When this happens, we are no longer focused on the reality of the present. Is your breakup misery really over that Dude, who you're better off without, who dumped you for the Diva Next Door, or is your mind using the breakup as an opportunity to dwell or project? If being dumped fuels such thoughts as, "I am always getting dumped. I will never find the right Dude!" Then your mind is wandering away from the reality of here and now and making you feel worse than you need to. Remember, your thoughts create your feelings. So, make a conscious attempt to control them.
Remember, Divas, eating comfort foods loaded with additives, buying a pair of $400.00 shoes, or drunk texting your ex will not make you feel better nor will it help win "him" back. You're a Fierce Diva now, so next time you're dumped, hold your head high and send off a silent "thank you" to the job, or other person. They probably weren't right for you to begin with, and now that they're gone, you're one step closer to the life you were meant to have.
Namaste, Divas!
© 2012 Ilene Evans
