Author Archives: Ilene

15 Things I Have Learned about the Impossible

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I walked to the starting line in semi darkness along with thousands of other runners, pouring into the streets of Philadelphia from their hotels. It was 6:00 am, Sunday November 20, 2011.  I had run hundreds of miles in preparation for that day.  I ran in rain, I ran in heat waves, I ran with friends and I ran alone.  I had learned a lot about my body and its limits, both the real and the self-imposed and during my training period, I had learned the difference between the two.   I was not in ideal shape for this run.  … Continue reading →

And Then We Ate

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We ate, and we ate a lot. We ate peanut butter out of jars. We pizza at a friend’s house who invited us over in the evenings to stay warm in their house, powered by a generator.  We ate garlic bread and pasta at a neighborhood potluck, which took our minds off of the cold and the darkness and the devastation for a few short hours.  I ate egg and cheese sandwiches handed out by volunteers from the Union Beach Fire Department while I walked the storm ravaged streets, helping people drag their waterlogged belongings to the curb.  We ate … Continue reading →

Please People! Leave Your Negligees at Home!

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I’m sure you wear lovely undergarments. But, like the rest of us, you may need to refurbish yours from time to time.  Or, maybe you just get bored.  That leopard print bra that you were in love with last season may feel dated to you now.  Or, like me, maybe your boobs changed in size after kids and breast feeding, and it just doesn’t fit right anymore. Perhaps you have thrown it in a plastic bag along with some other items for donation.  There is nothing wrong with it, right? It’s not worn or stained, therefore, maybe some nameless, faceless … Continue reading →

Keeping the Mess in Perspective (Guest Post at the Mommy Mess)

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I’m the first one to preach to all of you that life is messy and that we need to be OK with the mess.  We need to learn to thrive despite our messes.   However, I have a confession to make. I don’t like messes. I ask my guests to take off their shoes before coming into my house because shoes track dirt.  And dirt is messy!   I vacuum my carpets daily and sweep my kitchen floors after meals. I could naively tell you that I thrive on order. Yet, of course, “thriving on order” is a polite way of … Continue reading →

About A Hurricane

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I could tell you that we lived without power for seven days. I could tell you that when we lost use of our furnace due to the power outage, it got cold in my house.  Very cold.  I could tell you that we wore the same clothes over and over again until they smelled because we had didn’t have a working washing machine or dryer. I could tell you that I ran a tiny car-powered generator for the first seventy two hours, in an attempt to save our refrigerated food.  But that due to the gas shortage on the Jersey … Continue reading →

The Man Who Didn’t Like Me

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He didn’t like me, which was obvious from the moment he signed into the conference, and had trouble locating his name on my list of attendees.  The names weren’t alphabetized. I didn’t have time to alphabetize.  The entirety of my Friday was a last minute scramble to print and copy a dozen different forms and handouts, while answering emails with questions on the hotel, and loading up my car in time to get to the conference when it started. I have been one step behind preparing for this conference since I began this new job a month ago. There is … Continue reading →

Getting to the Bottom of It

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“I only have two minutes I say hastily as I pick up the phone.” I know it’s Jade from the caller ID.  She’s part of my posse.  I can rush her off the phone without feeling bad or without her taking it personally.  I’m running, this time, to preschool drop off and then onto work.  The pre-game was dog pee on the carpet and two girls in simultaneous meltdowns over what to wear to school, leaving me with 20 minutes to shower, pack lunches, and get into my big girl shoes.   “This won’t take long,” replies Jade on the other … Continue reading →

The Twenty-Five Minute Badass

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The body never lies. You can say you’re not stressed, but the clench in your stomach betrays you. You can say you’re not angry, but then the stiffness in your throat reminds you that you chose to stifle the words. You can’t say you’re not depressed, but that tightness in your chest knows differently. I can’t get away from my feelings.  I’m a yogi. I’ve trained endlessly to know the awareness of living in my body, my life, my feelings, and to teach others to do the same.   Even when I’d rather deny my feelings, it’s too late for … Continue reading →

Get it Done, Diva!

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I had grand visions for the night.  I would fold and put away the clean laundry that had been sitting in a basket for a better part of the week, I would catch up on reading blog posts, and work on my book outline.  I would shampoo my carpets and clean the bathtub that had been taken over by soap scum.  I would take care of the bills and return every unreturned email sitting in my inbox, some of which dated back to August.  C. was taking my kids for the night, all three, a gesture which was both brave … Continue reading →

My Big Girl Voice

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E. had a few things to say to me after my confession. “Why did you do that?” her voice sounding a little annoyed.   “They needed help.” “And why did they need help?” “Uh…” I stammered, feeling as if I was about to answer a trick question. “They were in a bind.” “Their bind is their problem!”  She continued.  “It’s not your problem, don’t make it your problem.  Next time you need to say no.”  “OK.” “How do you ever expect to get to the things that really matter to you if you keep saying yes to the things that … Continue reading →