Author Archives: Ilene

Saying Goodbye to the Skull Cap

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Every now and then, I get this crazy idea in my head about getting together with friends who live in different parts of the country. As a blogger, I have met people, at least in that virtual sense, from every corner of the US. During the meetups I’ve had with blogging buddies, both formal and informal, I have a hard time with goodbyes. I’ve grown close to many of you. My business website has been on my to-do list for a few months now and since the fall, I’ve had a note to get a professional headshot taken. Yet every … Continue reading →

A Modern Family Christmas

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I thought the story would be the nose ring.  I was almost certain I knew my mother’s reaction.  I heard her, as I sat in the back room of the Wilmington tattoo parlor, after I felt the needle pierce my skin, go, “Oh , darling, why did you do that to your nose?” Yes, I know.  Women my age are taking out their nose rings, not putting them in.  Correction.  Women my age took out their nose rings ten, if not twenty – years ago.  I was prepared for the inquisition as to why, her daughter, a responsible adult, with … Continue reading →

Speed

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I’m not a fast runner – or so I thought.  I had always seen myself as more of an endurance girl.  Sure, I could go the distance.  With one full marathon and a handful of half marathons under my belt in recent years, I had proven that. But I had always taken the course slowly. What’s interesting is that when we give ourselves a label, consciously or unconsciously, we feel compelled to stay true to it.  It’s almost as if stepping into a role outside of the confines of that label feels so impossible to us, that sometimes, we won’t … Continue reading →

Ten Reasons You Don’t Want to Date Me

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Every single mother who is dating has stories to tell. Sure, everyone in the dating world has stories, but the middle aged single mom stories are a brand all their own. I had drafted a “just for fun” post today about the ten reasons you wouldn’t want to date me, in which I offered up some of my biggest character flaws as a woman on the market and intertwined them with some of the more ridiculous moments I’ve lived the past few months while navigating this uncertain, unchartered territory.  At the last minute, I pulled the post.  It was humorous, … Continue reading →

A Million Little Things

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There are things I can talk about today that I never thought once of three months ago.  I can tell you how much credit card merchants charge business owners per transaction to swipe a Visa or Master Card.  I can tell you the required distance a hot water heater must be from an electrical box.  I can tell you about the advantages of three phase versus single phase electric.  I can tell you about grease interceptors and vent hoods and HVAC loads and privilege licenses and how a town determines whether or not a business establishment must have a public … Continue reading →

The Bridge

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I have six good memories of my father. When I was four, we spent the winter in Florida, and my dad bought me an ice cream sandwich for the good behavior I displayed one morning while running errands with him.  There was the time, also in Florida, that he saved me from being stuck in an elevator by myself.   After a drinking binge with my friends, as a teenager, where a drunken fall caused me to chip my front tooth, my father, a dentist by profession, took me to his office that night and bonded up the chip, without once … Continue reading →

Modern Family: Jersey Edition

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S. stood outside the driver’s side window. “Are you driving?”  He shouted through the glass. “Do you want me to?” “No.” I’m not surprised by this. In our 16 years of knowing each other, I can count the times I was behind the wheel with S. as a passenger. I jump out of the car and walk around to the passenger side and get in, while S. adjusts the mirrors. “It’s dirty in here.  Sorry about that,”  I say, as S. inspects the car that was once his, the car he’ll tell you I stole, but it was a fair … Continue reading →

Upside Down

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“I fell in love,” I said, wrapping my hands around my coffee cup. “Well, that was a mistake,” he replied, shaking his head from side to side. “You can’t do that when you go into business. “ I looked out the window of the coffeehouse, which faced the main drag through town, and recalled the moment it happened. I had given up on finding a commercial space to rent through a real estate agency.  The broker listings were scarce, they stood in undesirable locations, or commanded too much rent.  One morning, feeling particularly frustrated with my choices, I drove the … Continue reading →

Out of Order

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If you had asked me a few hours earlier, I would have thought the flat tire would have been the trickiest part of my day. When I finally decided to acknowledge the “Check Tire Pressure” light flashing on my dashboard, the air pump at the gas station sucked the air out of my tire instead of putting it in.  Maybe, had I paid closer attention, I would have noticed the rubber of the Goodyear sagging into the concrete before the tire actually went flat, or I would have bothered to flip the backwards piece of paper on top of the air … Continue reading →

A Difficult Conversation

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“Whose house are you going to?”  I ask as she is about to walk out the door. “Sarah’s,” my girl says as she steps into her flip flips. “Is her mom home?” “No, Jason’s watching them.” “I don’t want you in their house if their mom isn’t there.” “But…” “No going inside with a parent!” I say emphatically. I have given my oldest daughter a lot of freedom since moving from suburban New Jersey to coastal North Carolina.  Our town, which has a Mayberry feel, is quiet in the off season but not deserted.  The neighbors look out for one … Continue reading →