Author Archives: Ilene

What If I Told You

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Photo Credit: http://www.blogactionday.org What if I told you that 26.7 of% of children living in Brunswick County, North Carolina, where I now live, suffer from food insecurity?  What exactly does that mean?  Put bluntly, they do not know where they will find their next meal. What if I told you that 1 year after Hurricane Sandy devastated my former neighboring town of Union Beach, New Jersey, many residents have still not been able to rebuild, due to lack of insurance funds or FEMA funds or, have left families, in financial ruin, with no option but to walk away from their homes? … Continue reading →

I Love Your Blog

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I almost quit blogging this fall.  There’s not one simple reason, but many, which, at times, I can’t make sense of myself.   For one thing, I knew that after I relocated back in August, I’d face an enormous shift in how I’d need to use my energy and time. I’d need to create space to explore my new territory, its people, and its opportunities, endeavors that I realized would be impossible to accomplish while spending the same amount of time in front of my laptop. There is also a lot that’s gone on and that continues to go on that … Continue reading →

Good Stuff

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“Do you like it?” She asks. “It’s good,” I say,  “It’s really good.  And definitely the best I’ve eaten since I’ve lived here.” And it is good, worlds better than the Walmart pizza that I had begun to accept as passable, crisp yet chewy crust, flavorful cheese, tangy sauce.  I’ll definitely go back there for more. Tomorrow, even, knowing me. “Have you been running,” L. asks as we eat. “A lot,” I say.  “Probably more than I should be.  I ordered a case of vanilla Cliff shots from Amazon.  Have you ever eaten those things?  They’re like vanilla cupcake frosting.”  … Continue reading →

A Tale of Two Pizzas

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“How’s your pizza?” “It’s excellent.  You’ll love it.” “No seriously, how’s your pizza?”  I lean in a little bit.  “I’m from Jersey,” I add, as I toss my unruly hair, still unsure how to behave with its newly acquired southeastern frizz, over my shoulder.  “Pizza’s important to me,” this last statement delivered with a reverence typically reserved for a discussion about someone’s church, or their family, or the Superbowl. That’s how the conversation began when, one night, on our way to Walmart, I noticed a tiny storefront set back from the road with a sign outside advertising pizza.  Since landing … Continue reading →

Modern Family

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“Are there any Jewish people here?” My mother asks, over her vanilla yogurt and Swiss cheese sandwich. “I think there are a few in the gated community up the road,” I say, clearing dishes off the table. “Well that’s a relief,” my mom says.  “How did you hear?” “The Jews have secret smoke signals down here, Mom, ones that the Klan don’t recognize.” “Ilene…” my ex-husband says.  It’s the warning call, the one where he tells me to back off.  Just the use of the word Klan is feeding into my mother’s fear that I’ve moved myself and her grandchildren … Continue reading →

Tangled

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Change is hard, y’all. From having to drive 40 miles to get to the nearest Target and 600 miles to find good pizza, to having to deal with my massive tangle of unruly hair, due to Southeastern humidity. It’s a war y’all.  Every day, it’s a war between me and my hair. I have this blow dryer you see, that could probably be classified as a lethal weapon.   My hair dryer could take down anything you buy at the gun and ammo shop, for sure. It weighs at least ten pounds, people.  At least. I spend a good fifteen minutes … Continue reading →

The Familiar

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I felt out of sorts last week when, for the first time since college, I spent the Jewish high holy day Rosh Hashanah, without my family.  I should clarify that I’m not particularly religious.  I’ve discussed my ambivalence about religion before on my blog.  However, a traditionalist I am.  There are the rituals that come with certain holidays for me, the family dinners, the prayers,  the walks around my mother’s neighborhood with my children in between services at synagogue,  the rhythm of those days, so deeply ingrained in me, that the diversion from the familiar felt awkward. I briefly entertained … Continue reading →

Jersey Girls Don’t Pump Gas

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Have you heard?  I’m a southern belle now, y’all. I’ve left the land of landfills and urban sprawl for quieter pastures.  For a quiet island, to be specific. It’s a different world down here.  I haven’t found a decent slice of pizza since I’ve ventured below the Mason Dixon line,  but I’ve seen more gun and ammo shops than Snooki’s seen the inside of Seaside Heights motel rooms. I like island life, yet it means if I need something more than a kayak rental, I have to drive for it.  The only game in town is a Walmart, and by … Continue reading →

Rise

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My marriage had been in trouble for years.  It was an inconvenient truth that I had wanted to avoid.   We tried counseling.  We tried talking less and listening more. We tried date nights.  We continued to hit a wall over and over and over, until one morning on an early September day last year. It hasn’t been an easy year.   I doubt that anyone who’s gone through a divorce would tell you that the first year was easy.  It was a year where I’ve counted on friends.  It was a year where I’ve counted on my therapist.  I was a … Continue reading →

A Sort of Goodbye but Not Really

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I have never taken friendship lightly. There is a very good chance that if you were my friend twenty years ago, you’re still my friend now, and an even better chance if that you’re my friend now, you will be my friend twenty years from today.   If you are someone who matters to me, you can live on any continent on planet earth and I’ll find a way to stay in touch.  I may even find a way to pay you a visit. This weekend, I am relocating my family from New Jersey to an island on the North Carolina … Continue reading →