Category Archives: Happiness is an Inside Job

Bring on the Noise

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  “I think I know what you’re going to decide,” I say, after I’ve explained her options. “You do?” “I’m pretty sure of it.” “Is it OK? Mommy, is it OK?” The letter explained that our town will have two cheer squads this year for the age level of my daughter.  One will be competitive, whose goal will be to win the national title in their division, and one squad will be non-competitive, who will cheer at football games.   Their decision to split into two squads does not surprise me, since many of the parents of these girls, as … Continue reading →

The Fierce Diva Guide to Romance

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  I swear I’m not jaded, guys.  I’m a romantic at heart.  Really, I am!   Love heals. Love conquers all!  Love is kind, at least most of the time, anyway. However, the “thrill of the chase” thing is a different story.  Back in “the day,” I was never one to wait for a guy to call first, and I was always a bad “rules girl.”  Besides, that “chase-loving Neanderthal” usually dropped me like a bad piece of mammoth meat the moment I would show the tiniest bit of interest back.  Sounds eerily like a Taylor Swift song, does it not? … Continue reading →

Miles to Go Before I Sleep – Fierce Diva Anniversary Edition

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  I was going for witty and slightly profound.  I thought I’d sprinkle in a little bit of my “yoga talk,” as I often do. But the words weren’t there. So after 17 drafts or so, I scratched the idea of writing a "first anniversary of blogging post" and decided to speak my post instead. I created a vlog. In the words of Lisa and Ashley, "Oh. honey! No!"  That vlog was disastrous – like bad enough for Lisa and Ashley's pinboard disastrous.  My eyebrows move when I talk.  A lot. When I viewed the video I took of myself … Continue reading →

My Evil Mistress

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“I need a favor.” My mother’s voice quivered. “Mom, are you OK?”   I had just left work and gotten into my car, which was semi covered in the first round of slush from our Friday-Saturday snowstorm. “You don’t have any Diet Coke.  Can you stop at the store and get some?” My mother had moved in with us for the night in anticipation of the first blizzard of the winter.  The kids love having her around.  And they love that she travels with Carrie. I love having her around, because when she’s here, I can slip off to Target by … Continue reading →

Down There

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  I know it’s something important when R. calls me on my cell phone, especially since she’d prefer to avoid talking on the phone altogether. R., if you recall, phoned me a few months ago about my root chakra. It was an urgent call and the kind of call that only a best friend could make, and this day was no different, as I heard my phone ring while pulling into a parking space at Target. “You need to learn to walk with your vagina,” R. says matter-of-factly as I turn off my car. “Say what?” “I’m reading a book on … Continue reading →

It’s Complicated

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He was a sweet kid, around 20, I’d say, dark skinned and slightly plump and cheerful.  He was the resident “Jack of All Trades” at the Newark Crowne Plaza Hotel, one morning, mopping the floors, another, serving breakfast, and when we couldn’t get the sound to work on our slide projector, he figured out the problem.  He had become my right hand during my company’s annual conference. “Where do you live?” I ask during a quiet moment between workshops. “In Elizabeth,” he responds.  “We’ve only been here a year.  We came from Egypt.  But we’re Jewish,” he adds, as an … Continue reading →

Three Things That Make A Difference

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“Are you Mrs. Bernstein’s daughter?”  The attending physician asked as I rush through the double doors of the emergency room. I see my mother a few feet behind him, yet he directs me into a corridor, away from her.    What he says next comes to me in sound bytes.   “He collapsed…” “We’ve been waiting for you to get here…” ”Efforts to resuscitate have been unsuccessful….” Resuscitate? I knew this moment was coming, but that didn’t mean I was prepared for it.  My stepdad Milton had been sick for a number of months.   When he died on January 14, … Continue reading →

Fifty Shades of Shades

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I have a confession to make, and it’s not pretty. I have a dysfunctional relationship with sunglasses. Actually, one could go as far as calling me the sunglass sadist. I break my sunglasses constantly.  And these aren’t little injuries. They fall off the console in my car and get stepped on. They get tossed in the bottom of my bag and crushed by my wallet or scratched by keys. They get run over. They get eaten by my dogs. I’ll put it to you this way. People who did something very bad in a past life come back as a … Continue reading →

Balls

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Noah trotted into our living room as if he had lived here for years.  Our ninth foster dog, a Lhasa Apso mix, arrived the end of November from a shelter in Camden, New Jersey.      He was adorable, as you can see. But there was much more to Noah than this irresistible face. It was Noah’s “other end” that intrigued me. As Noah spent his first night with us, sniffing around the premises, I couldn’t help but notice his enormous set of balls. His balls were so big, they kind of got in the way of his being able … Continue reading →

Finding The Fire

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The end of 2012 hit with a bang – but not the kind of bang I expected.  We were sick this week, the kids and I.  Like, “super sick.”  The little one spiked a fever so high on Christmas night, that I was ready to drive her to the ER, until the Motrin, tepid baths, and cool wash cloths lowered her temperature “just enough” that I knew she was out of danger.  My older girl followed suit the next day, and then I came down with a full blown version of whatever they had which sent me begging my doctor … Continue reading →