Category Archives: Single Mom Stuff

A Modern Family Romance Part Two

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I wasn’t sure about the house.  It was close to the beach, it had a second floor wrap around porch that lent a great view of the ocean.  It had a ground level bedroom for guests.  But there were faults.  The rooms were small and musty and paneled with dark wood.  The kitchen wasn’t the least bit modern.  There was no dishwasher.  The clothing dryer was old.  Would the landlord call someone to fix it if it broke down?  I didn’t have much time to find a place to live, and rentals were sparse on our island, affordable rentals were … Continue reading →

A Modern Family Romance Part One

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“Does good pizza even exist down here?”  I asked B. on our first date. “Sure there does,” he replied, as he rattled off a short list of reputable places.  Some of them I had heard of.  There was that restaurant in Wilmington.  There was the place in Carolina Beach that had a good reputation.  But good compared to what? “No, seriously, good enough for a Jersey Girl kind of good?  Because North Carolina people have told me about the ‘good pizza’ before, but it’s never been the same.” Pizza talk took up a lot of our first date.  I decided … Continue reading →

Maybe This Could Be Big

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Her heart sank as she watched her girl’s squad on the performance floor below, from the middle tier of Sun National Stadium in Trenton. They hugged and screamed and jumped into each other’s arms.  It was a victorious moment, discovering that they qualified for the national cheer competition in Orlando.  But for her mother, it was a moment of panic. She knew the expenses would be high when she signed up her daughter for cheer, and she was aware of the costs of the national competition.  From sign up day to present moment, her life had changed precipitously. She had … Continue reading →

A Modern Family Valentine

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“I know, my car’s a mess.  You don’t have to tell me.” “I’ve seen it look worse,” says S., the man who thrives on order, as he loads the oversized pictures into the back of my cargo space. He follows me to the store in his car. I asked him when he scheduled the weekend with me to bring his tool box and a drill. Somewhere along East Oak Island Drive he disappears from behind me. A few minutes later, he shows up in my parking lot, handing me a cup of coffee. “Where’d you go?”  I ask. “B.’s place?” … Continue reading →

Signs

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It had been an unseasonably warm day for January, the kind of weather that we’re all pining for right now. It may have hit seventy degrees by that afternoon.  The kids ran door to door without jackets after school helping Fiona sell Girl Scout Cookies.  Afterward, they took out their bicycles. I couldn’t keep up with them as they sped around the block.  I was nursing a minor running injury and walked quickly but avoided a full out jog.   The older kids flew ahead of me on their two wheelers and even Scarlett managed to gain momentum on her training … Continue reading →

Modern Family: Jersey Edition

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S. stood outside the driver’s side window. “Are you driving?”  He shouted through the glass. “Do you want me to?” “No.” I’m not surprised by this. In our 16 years of knowing each other, I can count the times I was behind the wheel with S. as a passenger. I jump out of the car and walk around to the passenger side and get in, while S. adjusts the mirrors. “It’s dirty in here.  Sorry about that,”  I say, as S. inspects the car that was once his, the car he’ll tell you I stole, but it was a fair … Continue reading →

My Aha Moment from #BlogHer’13: Thank You Sheryl Sandberg

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I could feel the woman in the seat next to me stiffen as she tapped her trim, pink nails against her Kindle.  Crying makes people uncomfortable, especially when they’re sitting next to you on an airplane.  I had tried to keep quiet about things, face the window and go about my cry in silence, but it’s a cramped space on a plane.  It’s hard to remain an anonymous crier. I cry on airplanes often when I fly alone.  I’m out of my element when airborne, out of the place where I feel the need to be strong and composed.  On … Continue reading →

Must Love Dogs

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I didn’t want her to throw me a party. I thought I’d slip out of town quietly.  I’d say my goodbyes, of course, but without fanfare, one at a time, on the phone, at lunch, over coffee. The farewell party that Q. insisted she throw for me felt over the top. It felt emotional. Maybe it’s because there were so many people dear to me all in one place.  These were the friends I shared my best times with, and they were the friends who saw me through the worst.  They were the ones who got me through the year … Continue reading →

In Defense of Ex-Husbands

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  **Before I write one word here, let me begin by saying, that today, my heart belongs to Boston.  I send my condolences and prayers to all who were affected by yesterday’s tragedy. And, for those of us who have been gifted with life for one more day, never forget that we are here to live, and use up every inch of the space that we have been given.  So, dammit, go out and live. ** ### If you had asked me “what happened” a year ago, the answer wouldn’t have been the same. It would have been fueled with emotions, … Continue reading →

The In-Between

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  I’m late. As usual.   I run to the car, without the time to second guess combining the thick black rimmed glasses with the billowy skirt and the sturdy black boots.  I wonder if my boss questions what happened to that woman who showed up to interview, in the urban chic business attire, the patent leather heels, and the straightened, shiny hair,  which today, piles onto my shoulders, bigger than usual, thanks to the slight bit of damp on this cool spring morning. It’s spring break week, my work schedule at the mercy of friends willing to take my … Continue reading →